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I love the idea that it doesn’t take one person only to achieve your potential. It takes a village, it takes a community, a street, a teacher, a mother. – Mira Nair

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We believe you have big work to do in your community and in the world. But in order to care for the people around you, live courageously, make a difference and experience your life fully–you must be well cared for yourself.

We believe every woman deserves her very own care team. We all know “it takes a village” to raise a healthy and happy child. And it also takes a village to support a healthy and happy human throughout her lifespan.

A care team is your village–your crew, your clan, your people. It’s those who help you heal, navigate life with skill, and keep thriving in your body, mind, and relationships. It includes supportive friends, family and colleagues, encouraging groups you participate in, and a variety of professionals with a range of expertise. 

As women we nurture and support so many people and projects. Our capacity to keep doing this depends, in large part, on our ability to lean into vulnerability and let others care for us too.

True Strength

Life and health are best navigated with a team. 

Yet so many of us are trying to “go it alone”. I see this often in my Functional Medicine Practice. Women come to me exhausted and discouraged after years of trying to figure out a challenging health problem with little or no support. It’s incredible to see them flourish when we start putting a care team into place. 

If we truly want to thrive, as the innately social beings that we are, our independent ability to stand alone needs to be balanced with a healthy reliance on our village. People simply do better and are more likely to stay well when they have ample support and strong social ties.

Research on resilience shows that people who bend rather than break in the unavoidable storms of life know how to create and enlist a team of support. They reach out regularly to other resilient people in their lives–those who are reliable, encouraging, and can be present with them through adversity (without getting uncomfortable or trying to fix anything), as well as in life’s joys.

The resilient among us know a powerful truth: True strength includes reaching out regularly to the right people for help and support, and accepting it when it’s offered.  It also includes continuing to reach out, over and over again, until we find the help we need.

Essential, Not Optional

So why aren’t we all doing this regularly already??

For many of us, myself included, it can be tough to overcome the mental blocks to reaching out for care and support. Thoughts like… “this problem isn’t that big of a deal”, “I should spend this money on x, y or z instead”, “what if I reach out and get turned down, rejected or otherwise hurt in my vulnerable moment”, “I’ve tried to get help with this before and it didn’t work,” or “I should be able to do this on my own”. Sound familiar?

In a culture that equates self worth with productivity and independence it’s challenging to reach out for help. It feels unfamiliar to see it as a sign of strength. 

But the vitality of our life suffers dearly when we don’t reach out for support and care from others. Our health suffers. Our contentment suffers. Our job performance suffers. Our relationships with those we hold most dear suffer. So it’s really in everyone’s best interest that we not only offer support to others, but also build up our own deep well of support. 

It’s an amazing paradox too. “The more energy you give to caring for yourself, the more energy you have for everything else,” writes Michelle Segar, PhD and expert in behavior change.

So think of your personal care team as essential for your well-being–rather than a gift, optional, or in conflict with other important things in your life.

Building Up Your Village

Building up your village or care team takes an ongoing investment of time and vulnerability. Sometimes money too. But I promise (and research confirms!) it will pay off exponentially in the long run. 

The people and skills on your care team are unique to you and will change day to day, month to month, and year to year.  At any given time you might be investing more in your physical wellness, occupational/career wellness, your mental health, or the health of your most treasured relationships. And so the people and professionals you will call on for support and guidance will vary.

Since your care team is ever-evolving, we recommend checking in periodically to see where you might be able to use additional support and practice reaching out for a helping hand.

We created a handy little handout to help you do just that. Sign up below to get the Building A Village Reflection Guide sent right to your inbox. 

I hope this reminder that you deserve generous support throughout your life helps bring greater ease, care, health and connection to your days.

With Love,
Amber
Team Luminary